From the OA NoVA Intergroup Chair - November 2016
Dear Friends in Recovery,
True confessions time. Last month when I sat down to do my writing for NoVAtions, I misread the topic for the October issue, and instead of writing about the slogans, I wrote about abstinence (the November topic). After I proofread my piece, I hit send. I was so tickled that, for once, I turned in my writing on time! Then when I saw the draft of the newsletter the day before it was to be printed I realized my mistake. I was so embarrassed. I panicked—I didn't have time to rewrite the article. It would have to go out as it was (gulp, humble pie was on the menu that day). Not only had I made a mistake, but it was such a public one. Now you would know how stupid and careless I am! I am a fraud. I don't deserve a seat at the table (or even under the table). The only reason I am IG Chair is that no one else would do it (well, that is pretty much the truth, LOL!). Blah, blah, blah.
I'm sharing this with you because this is exactly the kind of diseased, self-centered thinking that has driven me to the food over and over again, and it absolutely could again—and that terrifies me. And maybe you can relate? What I remembered, by Higher Power's grace, shortly after recognizing my mistake is that I never have to feel shame again, unless I choose to. I could see this (let's be honest) pretty minor boo-boo as further proof that my worth is based on the (imagined) judgment of others waiting for me to fail. Or I could have gratitude that Higher Power lovingly provided me with yet another opportunity to do some spiritual weight lifting (yay!). What better place to be imperfect, but in the midst of a tribe of beautiful, nuanced human beings just like me—you, my dear friends in recovery. We who lift each other up, not tear each other down. Yes—this is the truth I choose to believe, for today!
Thank you for living this life with me! Together we get better!